Friday, December 30, 2011

KC School District Enrollment Halt Denied by Jackson County Judge

In a court hearing that many agree should not have been held in a Jackson County courtroom today, the 6 school districts who put in a petition to halt the transfer of students from the unaccredited Kansas City School district were denied today as Circuit Judge W. Brent Powell ruled against the temporary halt. Spokesmen from each of the six districts are expecting absolute chaos as thousands of inner city students and parents show up at their doorstep demanding to enroll their students in their accredited schools. The six schools who are expecting the worst at this point are The Center School District (we thought that this WAS a Kansas City School District), The Independence School District, The Blue Springs School District, The Raytown School District and The North Kansas City School District.

Let's just put up the main points in this situation to make it simple:

1. The Kansas City School District failed for a reason. The parents of the students in that district do not care enough about their children's education (the majority, that is - there are some exceptions so don't get all worked up). The fact is, the KC School District FAILED, it had it's chance, and it FAILED, so yes, we can say that the students are undereducated and that blame falls squarely on the parents who did not get involved.

2. The neighboring districts do not want an influx of students from the ghetto mixing in with their students. No one has said it, but believe me, THEY ARE THINKING IT. These students will bring an element of crime, thuggery and failure to these districts, which is not fair. These students couldn't make it work in their own district, so the answer is to abandon ship and go mess up another district? Not a good plan. Stay and fix your own problems. Can't wait to see the first urban mother on the news talking about how the neighboring school districts are "being racist" towards her children. Ah, the race card, it will definitely get played before this is all over. Race has nothing to do with the failure of your children and the society that you have created for them. Get over yourselves and fix your neighborhoods and schools and quit blaming everything on someone else. You got your president, now shut up and start doing some actual WORK.

3. The neighboring districts want their tuition PAID IN FULL, and PAID UP FRONT. It has been predicted by experts that most of these students who attempt to transfer will fail in the new school district and return or drop out within months or even weeks. The schools accepting new students have every right to demand their money up front so that they don't waste countless overhead and man hours preparing for these students, only to have them drop out when they can't keep up. The City of Kansas City wants to pay on a "month to month" basis, kind of like a low rent ghetto apartment complex or a sleazy hotel. That should tell you something right there.

4. The students and parents of the Kansas City School District DON'T NEED TO PANIC! It is ok for your kids to attend and graduate from an unaccredited school. They will still be able to get into the college of their choice on the merit of good SAT scores and academic history. If your student doesn't have a good academic history or cannot score well on the SAT, then they are going to fail anyway - a change of school district is not going to change that - sorry.

Just as a matter of easy transportation math, I would assume that the Center School District would be getting the worst of this influx of students. The Center School District lies closest to the Kansas City School District, and actually has a student body that would closely resemble the students who currently attend the Kansas City School District schools. Urban, low test scoring, police records, history of violence and bad parenting - the Center School District might actually be the best fit for the transferring students. But do they have enough room? Will the students who transfer lower Center School District's overall standing with the state as far as test scores, etc.?

Aside from the suburban school administrator's fears of large numbers of students trying to squeeze into their schools, there is, of course, a matter of money. The neighboring school districts have a policy in place that clearly states that a student wishing to transfer who does not reside in the the district boundaries must pay tuition (in North Kansas City's case around $9500.00), and the fee must be paid UP FRONT. The Kansas City School District has offered to pay around $3700.00 per student on a MONTHLY payment schedule. This is not satisfactory to the neighboring schools and is most likely a reflection on the City of Kansas City's lack of faith in the dropout rate of the students who will attempt to attend schools that are far advanced in education and curriculum, and most of the students who transfer will simply not be able to keep up and will either return to the Kansas City School District or simply drop out.

Here is a great quote from a teacher:

"What makes these school districts different is the level of parental and community support. What makes these schools different is that most of the parents are very involved in our children's lives and education and are actually parenting, raising our children to be productive, law abiding members of society."

And that, my friends sums it up pretty well.

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Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Kansas City School District to Lose Accreditation Jan 1st, 2012

After meeting just 3 of the 14 accreditation standards on it's most recent evaluation, The Missouri State School Board announced that it will be revoking the Kansas City School District's accreditation effective January 1st, 2012. This will mark the second time in ten years that the Kansas City School District has lost it's accreditation (lost accreditation in 2000 - 2002). The Missouri State School Board voted unanimously, and passed down the verdict only weeks after the sudden resignation of Superintendent John Covington who quickly packed his bags and slithered out of town to take a position in Michigan, overseeing a state administered school district. Three other Kansas City School District cabinet chiefs would soon follow Covington to pursue careers in Michigan and the failing Detroit School District.

There are currently five neighboring school districts who have filed a court petition and subsequently a law suit against the Kansas City School District to control the massive amounts of students who are attempting to transfer to the accredited school districts just outside of Kansas City. These five districts are The Blue Springs School District, The Independence School District, The Lee's Summit School District, The Raytown School District and the North Kansas City School District. The court order has put a temporary halt on student transfers to these schools from the Kansas City School District.

The 14 standards by which accreditation of school districts in the state of Missouri are as follows:

Standard 1: Mission and Goals

The institution’s mission clearly defines its purpose within the context of higher education and indicates who the institution serves and what it intends to accomplish. The institution’s stated goals, consistent with the aspirations and expectations of higher education, clearly specify how the institution will fulfill its mission. The mission and goals are developed and recognized by the institution with the participation of its members and its governing body and are used to develop and shape its programs and practices and to evaluate its effectiveness.

Standard 2: Planning, Resource Allocation, and Institutional Renewal

An institution conducts ongoing planning and resource allocation based on its mission and goals, develops objectives to achieve them, and utilizes the results of its assessment activities for institutional renewal. Implementation and subsequent evaluation of the success of the strategic plan and resource allocation support the development and change necessary to improve and to maintain institutional quality.

Standard 3: Institutional Resources

The human, financial, technical, physical facilities, and other resources necessary to achieve an institution’s mission and goals are available and accessible. In the context of the institution’s mission, the effective and efficient uses of the institution’s resources are analyzed as part of ongoing outcomes assessment.

Standard 4: Leadership and Governance

The institution’s system of governance clearly defines the roles of institutional constituencies in policy development and decision-making. The governance structure includes an active governing body with sufficient autonomy to assure institutional integrity and to fulfill its responsibilities of policy and resource development, consistent with the mission of the institution.

Standard 5: Administration

The institution’s administrative structure and services facilitate learning and research/scholarship, foster quality improvement, and support the institution’s organization and governance.

Standard 6: Integrity

In the conduct of its programs and activities involving the public and the constituencies it serves, the institution demonstrates adherence to ethical standards and its own stated policies, providing support for academic and intellectual freedom.

Standard 7: Institutional Assessment

The institution has developed and implemented an assessment process that evaluates its overall effectiveness in achieving its mission and goals and its compliance with accreditation standards.

Standard 8: Student Admissions and Retention

The institution seeks to admit students whose interests, goals, and abilities are congruent with its mission and seeks to retain them through the pursuit of the students’ educational goals.

Standard 9: Student Support Services

The institution provides student support services reasonably necessary to enable each student to achieve the institution’s goals for students.

Standard 10: Faculty

The institution’s instructional, research, and service programs are devised, developed, monitored, and supported by qualified professionals.

Standard 11: Educational Offerings

The institution’s educational offerings display academic content, rigor, and coherence appropriate to its higher education mission. The institution identifies student learning goals and objectives, including knowledge and skills, for its educational offerings.

Standard 12: General Education

The institution’s curricula are designed so that students acquire and demonstrate college-level proficiency in general education and essential skills, including at least oral and written communication, scientific and quantitative reasoning, critical analysis and reasoning, and technological competency.

Standard 13: Related Educational Activities

The institution’s programs or activities that are characterized by particular content, focus, location, mode of delivery, or sponsorship meet appropriate standards.

Standard 14: Assessment of Student Learning

Assessment of student learning demonstrates that, at graduation, or other appropriate points, the institution’s students have knowledge, skills, and competencies consistent with institutional and appropriate higher education goals.

The Kansas City School District failed 11 out of these 14 standards.

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Tuesday, December 27, 2011

MU Tigers Win Independence Bowl 2011 Crush UNC

Our MU Tigers continue to crush opponents who stand in their way. KU was crushed by MU effortlessly, ending the Border War series with MU ahead in total wins and will be locked in eternity proving that MU is the better team over 100 years of games vs the pathetic and weak KU Jayhawks. This weekend was the Independence Bowl featuring the star MU Tigers vs the lowly University of North Carolina. The Mizzou Tigers crushed North Carolina by a score of 41 - 24.

This game was over by halftime as UNC had no chance from the start. The Tigers took a huge lead in the game and continued to run effortlessly over UNC for the remainder of the Independence Bowl live on national TV for the whole country to see. It is clear that MU is going to be a dominating factor in the SEC after becoming bored with dominating KU and the other teams in the big 12 for so many years.

It was considered by most NCAA experts that MU got a shitty deal when it came to handing out the bowl games in 2011, but they did not complain, held their heads up high and went to the Independence Bowl and kicked some butt. Look for big things for the MU athletic department in the future, they are definitely the team to watch!

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Monday, December 26, 2011

Court Petition to Stop Student Transfers from Kansas City School District Schools

Since the Kansas City School District will officially be stripped of it's accreditation on January 1st, 2012, some students currently enrolled in the Kansas City School District are planning to "jump ship" and transfer to school districts outside of the Kansas City School District in order to graduate or attend an accredited school. On Friday, 5 of these school districts filed a petition in court to temporarily block students from transferring out of the Kansas City school district and into neighboring school districts with accreditation still in tact. The five school districts that petitioned the court were Blue Springs, Independence, North Kansas City, Lee's Summit and Raytown.

Under normal circumstances, parents can send their students to any school they wish. If they live in the school's district, the students can attend for free and the school district provides transportation to those areas. However, if a parent wants to send their student to a school outside of their district, they must pay a tuition and provide their own transportation, for example, the tuition to attend a school in the North Kansas City School District is currently $9500.00 UP FRONT. The City of Kansas City only has budgeted $3770.00 per student for transfers, and obviously that amount is not going to cover it. Not only that, but most parents of students in the Kansas City School District most likely couldn't even afford a third of the cost to transfer their students to neighboring districts.

Parents: Don't Panic! Since it is unlikely that any students coming out of 4 years in a Kansas City School District school are planning on attending Harvard on an academic scholarship, there really isn't much reason to panic and those students attending and getting ready to graduate from a Kansas City School District should have no problem getting into a college that they qualify to get into with SAT scores or athletic scholarships. If a university wants a student, they can, at their discretion, accept a student who has a degree from a non-accredited school district. If you are the parent of a student who will graduating from the Kansas City School District, it might be best to get your kid studying HARD for the SAT test, and not worry about shuffling them off to a strange new school. If a student's SAT scores and academic record are in order, they can go to any community college including Longview Community College, Johnson County Community College, or any Metropolitan Community College to get their start. After 2-4 semesters at any of these community colleges, if they perform well they can go to any school they want and the unaccredited high school diploma will not be a factor.

The petition that was filed by the 5 school districts (Blue Springs, Independence, North Kansas City, Raytown and Lee's Summit) is attempting to get some sort of organized plan in place before estranged new students just start pouring into their schools. Most students from the Kansas City School District will not be able to afford to transfer to another district, but they should not panic as they can still go to college unobstructed as long as their SAT scores and academic history are in order.

Also, parents, don't forget that not every child is cut out to attend college. If you are a parent of a student who is performing poorly, and scored poorly on the SAT exam, there are trade schools and on the job training programs out there. Remember the immortal words of Ted Knight as Judge Smails from Caddyshack, "The world needs ditch diggers too!"

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Friday, December 23, 2011

Christmas Music Radio Station Kansas City 2011

In case any of you were out there wondering where the Christmas music radio station in Kansas City has moved to, it is at 105.5 FM on your radio dial.

That's right, all roads eventually lead to St. Joseph, Missouri for some reason and this year's Christmas music radio station is no exception, you can listen to all of your favorite hits on KJO 105.5 FM. I guess the ad revenues weren't adding up for 102.1 FM and this year they are not doing the Christmas music. So tune into KJO 105.5 FM and turn any room or car into Christmas before your very eyes :)

Merry Christmas from your friends at Kansas City News!

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Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Christmas Carol Repertory Theatre Kansas City

Christmas is in full swing in Kansas City as the frantic last minute shopping begins, people are flying around recklessly in their vehicles trying to pick up the kids, get the groceries, plan the dinner, wrap up last minute business at the office, and CRAM it all in by Friday. We, here at Kansas City News, have been doing all of those things as well, but on Thursday night December 22nd, we are going to treat ourselves to a night of theatre, taking in Kansas City Repertory Theatre's production of "A Christmas Carol" at the Spencer Theatre. This revamped and modernized version of the classic play stars local veteran of the stage Gary Neal Johnson, who went to Center High School and performed in plays with other local Kansas City dance and acting standouts like Kathleen Bowen, who performed with the Betty Tilletson School of Dance, performing in shows at the Lyric Theatre among others.

A Christmas Carol - A Special Performance, will run through December 26th, 2011 and tickets are still available for performances.

Here is a blurb from the Kansas City Repertory Theatre about A Christmas Carol:

Last season for the 30th anniversary production of A Christmas Carol the Rep gave the venerable holiday show a new look and feel, while staying true to Dickens’ Victorian London sensibilities about hope, redemption and the meaning of Christmas which The Pitch magazine described as “a feast of a holiday show!” The new turntable set, special effects and audience interaction all return this year, along with a cast of Kansas City’s favorite veteran and up-and-coming actors, led by everyone’s favorite Scrooge, Gary Neal Johnson. You will also experience a few additional surprises in the 2011 production of Kansas City’s favorite holiday entertainment. "Combines the familiar and the new into a compelling tale!" – Kansas City Star

Appropriate for All Ages.

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Sunday, December 18, 2011

Chiefs Packers 2011 Chiefs Break Packers Win Streak

Cost of your POSER, BANDWAGON RIDING Aaron Rodgers jersey = $42.00
Tickets to Arrowhead today = $100.00 +
Getting beer poured on you by Chiefs fans who can kick your ass = humiliation

Watching your team get their ASSES KICKED by the CHIEFS = PRICELESS!

Sorry to all of you poser bandwagon Green Bay Packers fans out there, but your team officially sucks. The Chiefs ROUT the Packers today 19 - 14 in a game that revealed that the Packers are not even going to make it past round 1 in the playoffs. The Chiefs easily walked all over the Packers today as Romeo Crennel coached the Kansas City Chiefs to victory over the lucky and somehow undefeated Packers. The Chiefs ended the Packers win streak today. Done.

Once again, the Chiefs dominate on defense, stuffing Aaron Rodgers on every down. The Packers were unable to move the ball at all, and lost miserably at Arrowhead Stadium. The Chiefs started quarterback Kyle Orton, who got his first win as a Chief as he led the team to a seamless victory over the hapless Packers. The Chiefs hogged the game clock, keeping the ball in their possession for well over half of the game. Today was a great showing by the Chiefs offensive line, who up until today have been severely lacking. Kyle Orton was able to sit back in the pocket and complete passes to Steve Breaston, Dwayne Bowe, and added to a total of 438 total yards on offense. The Packers were pathetic for the entire game, and the spineless Packers fans who were in attendance at Arrowhead were stuffed and stifled early and often as the Chiefs marched right over them. Hopefully the Chiefs fans were pouring plenty of beer on the poser Packers fans as they watched their team get pummeled by the mighty Chiefs. This game reminded us of the Pittsburgh Steelers game a few years ago after they won the Super Bowl and they came into Arrowhead with all of the poser fans wearing Rothlesburger (don't care if we spelled his stupid name right or not - he's not even worth Googling to find out) and the Chiefs stomped the crap out of the Steelers that day.

Go home Packers fans, your team is officially done. But thanks for playing. And, you suck.

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Saturday, December 17, 2011

Lower Blood Pressure - Naturally and Medically

Many sources are in disagreement about how to lower blood pressure. Some sources will tell you that you should engage in methods to lower blood pressure naturally, and others (and definitely doctors) will tell you that you need to lower your blood pressure with medication. We conducted a study that shows that both can work together to lower blood pressure.

In a one month study, we engaged in the following methods to lower a 40 year old male's blood pressure. This person's blood pressure had been about 150 / 100 for at least 5 years. His doctor did not put him on medication right away and suggested exercise, diet and lifestyle changes to reduce stress in order to lower blood pressure naturally. No specific dietary items were mentioned, nor were any pamphlets etc. given to the patient.

When the patient's blood pressure continued to register 150 / 100 at doctor visits, at the age of 40 the patient was prescribed 10 mg of Lisinopril to attempt to medically control his high blood pressure. Lisinopril is the most popular blood pressure medication prescribed in the USA currently, and varies in dosage from 5 mg up to 80 mg per day. The patient started taking the Lisinopril and noticed that his blood pressure dropped to around 105 / 71 and he was feeling dizzy during the day. At night his blood pressure would return to a higher level of around 130 / 92, perhaps when the Lisinopril was wearing off. And after a few weeks of taking Lisinopril, the patient's blood pressure would stay at a fairly constant 140 / 92 as if the patient's body was not being affected by the medication as much.

There is no information available about the length of the effects of Lisinopril during a given 24 hour period except that it was noted in some medical studies that tests showed high blood pressure in patients just before their next daily dosage of Lisinopril was to be taken. In our study, we concluded that a person must take a daily dosage of Lisinopril on a consistent basis for as long as 3 months before positive results manifest, OR the patient's blood pressure went down due to the introduction of a non-medical treatment for high blood pressure at the same time. This is the method that was used to lower blood pressure naturally in this article.

The patient, after taking Lisinopril for 2 months, noticed a slight drop in blood pressure, but it remained around 127 / 93 (bottom number remained high throughout) during the 2 months with only medical treatment. Then, during the 3rd month (where we started the study), the patient began adding non-medical treatment along with taking 10 mg of Lisinopril each day. The following things were added to the patient's medical treatment:

Step 1. A daily glass of "mean green", which is the juice made famous by the movie "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead". The recipe for mean green from the movie is simple; in a good quality juicer (our patient used the Jack Lalanne's Power Juicer available at any WalMart - do NOT put in dish washer) and juice in the following ingredients:

4 leaves of Kale (all of these ingredients can be found at WalMart)
4 Stalks of Celery
2 Green Apples
1/2 of a Cucumber
1/2 of a Lemon
1 inch of fresh raw Ginger

Step 2. Now, here is where we gave this recipe a twist to help lower blood pressure. While drinking this glass of mean green juice, EAT ONE CLOVE OF RAW GARLIC. Just take little bites of the garlic clove, then IMMEDIATELY put some juice in your mouth as you chew the garlic clove entirely until it is pulp, then swallow. The garlic clove should be fresh and should feel similar to eating a raw Jalapeno pepper if it is fresh, thus you will need to keep some mean green juice going in your mouth while you chew the bites of garlic.

Please note: both the mean green juice and the garlic clove must be prepared and eaten within 1 hour. Do not mix up a batch of mean green juice and put it in your refrigerator for later, you must make the juice just before you plan to drink it, and you must only peel the garlic clove just before you plan to eat it. Vegetables and juices lose nutrients every minute that they are exposed to air and thus become "dead food", and garlic cloves lose almost all nutritional value after just 45 minutes of being peeled.

Step 3. Finally, what we all dread, the patient began to do at least 20-30 minutes of cardio exercise each day. This is the hardest part for most people, but it has to be done.

After combining the three steps:

1. Take Lisinopril 10 mg each day at the same time
2. Drink one glass of mean green juice and eat a raw garlic clove
3. Put in 20-30 minutes of cardio exercise daily

Our patient lowered his blood pressure to a nice 118 / 75 - we took measurements all throughout the day, and they remained constant. Great results! Please note that Kansas City News is not a medical source, nor are we doctors or medical professionals. This was just an experiment that happened to work to lower blood pressure naturally AND medically at the same time with positive results so we though it was worth sharing.

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Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Troops Welcomed Home to Kansas City

As thousands of troops are arriving home to Kansas City, their families are gathering to greet them and looking forward to celebrating the holidays together as a family. Some soldiers have been in Iraq for over 3 years, others have been serving on and off for the last 9 years doing tours of 1-3 years at a time. Upon running for office, Obama promised to bring American troops home by December 31st, 2011. At this time 17,000 American troops are scheduled to stay in Iraq to man 7 US bases and assist in the departure of the remaining troops returning home during the next month.

In addition to the troops that will remain in Iraq to man the US bases, 740 "trainers" will also remain to assist in training Iraqi civilians in weapons technology and other military tactics. Officials in Iraq told reporters that most of the "trainers" that remain in Iraq are actually weapons dealers and not military at all.

The local news will be televising several heart felt moments as troops return home to Kansas City and their families over the next few weeks. It will be great to have our troops home in time for the holidays and we are very grateful for their services in Iraq. The return of the troops signifies the end of the "war" or whatever you want to call it in Iraq and Iran, and what we accomplished was at the very least sending a message that the USA is not to be harassed and we, here at Kansas City News, stand by what George Bush started after 9/11, sending the entire world a message that the USA will not just stand around with their hands in their pockets after we are attacked. We will COME AND GET YOU. Be assured of that. Other countries prefer more liberal views and stand around doing nothing while other countries take land from them, and take over their governments, but not the USA - we stand up for our country and we are proud of our military who will strike down upon any enemy that poses a threat to the United States.

Troops will be returning from Iraq to Kansas City by the hundred for the next few weeks as we get ready to celebrate the holiday season.

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Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Chiefs Fan Puts Sign In Yard to Scott Pioli and Clark Hunt

Northland resident and Chiefs season ticket holder Mike Mason and his neighbors are fed up. On Monday night, Mason and some neighbors erected a 55 foot sign in his front yard with a message to Clark Hunt and Scott Pioli to make some changes in the Kansas City Chiefs organization.

The sign was intentionally designed as a morale building tool for Chiefs fans as they were going to write positive messages on the sign to motivate Chiefs fans in the neighborhood. That was last season - after the events of the 2011 season, these Chiefs season ticket holders are asking for their money back. The sign in the front yard reads "Attention Scott Pioli & Clark Hunt from a 33 year season ticket holder", the sign points out that the Chiefs are $32 Million dollars under the spending cap as well as questions starting quarterback Tyler Palko and the pitch play to Jackie Battle in the end zone that resulted in a safety against the Jets on Sunday. Mason and his fellow season ticket holding neighbors are saying that "enough is enough" and that they want their money back...oh, and a free hot dog.

It is no secret that The Kansas City Chiefs, like the Kansas City Royals do not spend enough money on players. The owners of both franchises simply pocket the left over money from the salary cap pool that is set aside to make team improvements, draft high dollar players and coaches, and generally improve the Chiefs and the Royals' chances of competing with the other teams in the league. Chiefs owner Clark Hunt pockets the cap money and instead of spending the cap money on badly needed players, Hunt spent the money revamping Arrowhead Stadium, essentially finding even more ways to make money off of Chiefs fans. Hunt also raised all ticket prices and also parking prices at Arrowhead to a whopping $27 per vehicle in 2011. David Glass, owner of the Royals, has done the exact same thing, he has pocketed all of the Kansas City Royals cap money and instead of going out and getting high dollar players and/or keeping Royals players who become great (like Zack Grienke), Glass also revamped Kauffman Stadium with more bars and distractions for fans to spend more money on, and more importantly provide something to do besides watch the atrocity that is happening down on the field.

When David Glass and Clark Hunt decided to revamp both stadiums they might as well have said "Hey fans! Don't pay any attention to the team that is pathetic and getting their asses kicked on the field down there, look at this shiny new BAR! And look at these neat little pictures of ex Chiefs and Royals players on little spin cards, and DON'T FORGET TO STOP IN AND SPEND SOME MONEY AT OUR NEW GIFT SHOP! But whatever you do, do NOT pay attention to the actual sports teams because they suck."

What Clark Hunt and David Glass are doing to our beloved sports teams is criminal. They are pocketing all of the money and spending mere pennies on improving the teams and coaches. Just think of all of the money the Glass family are going to pocket after hosting the 2012 MLB All Star Game - they are going to make a MINT on that freakshow. The fans in Kansas City are so dedicated that they will continue to attend the games anyway. It is a shame, but most fans only go to Chiefs games to tailgate and to get drunk. Chiefs season ticket holders like Mike Mason have a right to be upset, and hopefully this message will get to the greedy owners that are ruining this city's great sports legacies.

More on Mike Mason's Chiefs yard sign on the video below:

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Monday, December 12, 2011

Man Escapes from Prison Lafayette County Jail Tommy Haubrich

Just like in the movies, Tommy Haubrich, who was serving consecutive sentences for robbing Walgreens pharmacies has done the near impossible - he escaped! Tommy gained access to a maintenance room that led to the roof of the Lafayette County Jail on Saturday night and escaped from the prison. It was not until Sunday afternoon that prison officials discovered Haubrich had escaped so we're guessing that he is probably almost over the wall in Mexico or somewhere in the deep woods in Canada.

Haubrich pled guilty in 2010 to charges of robbery as he and a few buddies were going around knocking over local Walgreens stores robbing the pharmacies in order to get pain pills. Details weren't mentioned but they were probably after the popular pain killer Oxycontin, which has a high street value and a large client base as many Americans are addicted to Oxycontin (check out the TV show "Intervention" for a close look at Oxycontin addicts and their daily habits). It is highly unlikely that Tommy Haubrich is dangerous, and he is most likely trying to lay as low as he can, making his way toward an area of the world where he can find shelter, hide out, and probably score some Oxycontin.

Breaking out of prison isn't easy I'm sure and Tommy Haubrich proved that he has what it takes to bust out of the joint. He was reported to have over 100 years of prison time coming to him and it must have been too much to fathom for this prisoner as he took matters into his own hands and broke out of jail. Haubrich is described as being 5'10, 200 pounds and is what authorities are calling "clean shaven". Tommy probably won't be clean shaven for long with that report floating around the news, he will hear that and begin growing a beard and mustache immediately. He might even head for the Ozarks as it would take quite awhile to find anyone down there since it became a ghost town back in 2009.

The Lafayette County Jail is located in Lexington, Missouri, but the internet has very little information on the jail - no photos, inmate info or anything that we could find. A sneaky little prison in a broken down town where the 31 percent of households have children and only 48 percent of households have married inhabitants. The mean income for Lexington, Missouri is a mere $17,000 per year. It sounds as though Haubrich had somewhat of a plan in place, and most likely arranged for transportation to assist him in his escape. If he indeed has access to a motor vehicle he is most likely miles away from Missouri by now.

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Sunday, December 11, 2011

Chiefs Jets 2011 AFC Playoffs Out Of Picture

It is official, The Kansas City Chiefs will not be making an appearance in the NFL Playoffs in 2011. While we had placed our hopes in the hands of the Kansas City Chiefs defense, they just couldn't carry the team today vs the New York Jets. Tyler Palko did his usual job of scrambling around, getting sacked and throwing interceptions, but the defense just didn't show up today. The Chiefs defense needed to get some pressure on mediocre quarterback Mark Sanchez but were unable to do so. Sanchez threw 2 touchdowns and effortlessly ran 2 more in himself with absolutely no resistance from the Chiefs defense.

The Chiefs almost set a record in penalties and penalty yards today as they had 11 total penalties for over 100 yards, 81 of those yards came on ONE DRIVE when the defense committed 5 penalties for 81 yards, and eventually coach Todd Haley got involved and get an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty all by himself when he berated the referees during the penalty fueled drive by the Jets.

Dwayne Bowe dropped an easy touchdown catch in the fourth quarter, but the game was way over by then and although it was a disappointment, it didn't really impact the game. In another comedic moment, kicker Ryan Succop fluffed an onside kick attempt, rolling his left foot over the ball and kicking the ball about 2 yards forward awkwardly, giving the Jets the ball on the Chiefs 38 yard line. Murphy's Law could not have applied more to this game as what could go wrong did go wrong for the Chiefs. It was an embarrassing performance by the Chiefs and it was a good thing that the game wasn't a Sunday or Monday night game where the entire world would have been watching.

With the Chiefs season officially over, they will crawl into a Packers fan filled Arrowhead Stadium on November 18th, and essentially play an away game at home since Arrowhead will be filled with bandwagon fake Packers fans with their freshly purchased Rodgers jerseys and their flaky pride put out for all to see. It would be great if The Chiefs could just skip the game all together as seeing the stadium full of fake Packers fans cheering all game is going to be infuriating. Hey Packers fans who live in Kansas City, why don't you just MOVE to Green Bay and get the fuck out of our stadium - you guys are spineless and weak and I hope someone spills beer all over you and your fake Packers jersey. What tools you are.

At this point, the only thing that the Kansas City sports fans have to look forward to is the 2012 MLB All Star Game set to take place in Kansas City next year.

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Friday, December 9, 2011

Chiefs Jets 2011 Kansas City Chiefs

With thier hopes of making the playoffs barely breathing, The New York Jets may have to win out the remainder of their games to earn a spot in the AFC playoff picture. Their remaining 4 games will include facing The Kansas City Chiefs this Sunday at MetLife stadium at 12pm followed by bouts against the Philadelphia Eagles, New York Giants and finally the Miami Dolphins. After watching several Jets games this season, this just isn't going to happen. Anyone watch the Sunday night game in week 4 vs the Ravens? After watching that debacle, coupled with the Jet's recent loss to the luckiest team in the world Denver Broncos on Thursday night, I just don't think that the Jets have what it takes to be a playoff contender.

With that being said, let's turn to our Kansas City Chiefs. You cannot give enough credit to the Chiefs defense right now, they are performing so well that we don't even need an offense, well, maybe just a little bit. But seriously, if the Chiefs defense can just get a pick 6 this Sunday, or a fumble recovery touchdown, or at least put the offense on the 2 yard line - we could win this game. The only reason that the last game looked so close was because the Chiefs weren't awarded the defensive score that we earned in the play where we clearly had a safety and the refs called holding on a nonexistent player (number 69? Jared Allen? Are you here?) when the holding play DEFINITELY occurred deep in the end zone. With those 2 points on the board and a resulting kick coming to the Chiefs, that game would have looked like a blow out. Slow and boring, yes, but a blowout none the less.

The Chiefs defense has taken the team on their shoulders, led by Tamba Hali (8 sacks, 2 forced fumbles), Derrick Johnson who is playing like a man possessed, taking out the Bear's star running back Matt Forte within his first few carries last week with a SMASHING tackle, and of course the emergence of our rookie draft pick Justin Houston who has finally started showing some signs of life at line backer. Mark Sanchez cannot be looking forward to this game, as he will be sacked repeatedly and will hopefully even cough up a few fumbles. The Jets running game is almost nonexistent with the ever slow Shonn Greene gaining just a couple yards per carry at best. Old man Ladainian Tomlinson leads the pre game chants, but that's about it. He's good for a few catches in the flat, which has proved to be a weakness in the Chiefs defense in the past so they should keep at least one eye on that.

Tyler Palko will again get the start this week, as he faces his old college teammate from the University of Pittsburgh Darrelle Revis. There has been no mention of Kyle Orton since he was injured after just one snap last week. Thomas Jones should be fired up as well as he returns to MetLife Stadium where he was the star running back a few years ago. Our prediction for this game is Jets 24, Chiefs 13 as the Chiefs will put up a good fight but will eventually be overmatched by Jets wide receivers Plaxico Burress and Santonio Holmes who will probably bust a big play or two in between Sanchez sacks.

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Thursday, December 8, 2011

Jardine's Jazz Club in Kansas City Bad Checks

As many of you know by now, Jardine's jazz nightclub on the Plaza in Kansas City abruptly closed their doors last weekend and pulled the rug out from under 15 employees and at least two musical acts that were scheduled to perform that weekend. One of the bands, The Dave Stephens Swing Orchestra was scheduled to perform 2 shows on Saturday, and were called at the last minute with a message that the entire staff at Jardine's had been fired and there would be no one available to work the shows. Jardine's proceeded to close the establishment entirely, putting a note on the door that they were "closed for repairs". The note later changed to say that Jardine's would be reopening on December 14th, and that the Kansas City bands booked to perform would go on as scheduled.

Since this happened, several former Jardine's employees are coming forward with their versions of the story, most of them claiming that the owner of Jardine's, Beena Johnson is an alcoholic and a cocaine abuser and has been screwing employees out of their pay for years as well as using mental and physical abuse on them. Former Jardine's employee "Stevie" and another employee who came forward today "Laura" says that Beena physically abused them and held back their pay for weeks at a time.

The latest breaking news from our sources at Kansas City News is from band leader Dave Stephens, who's show was cancelled suddenly last Friday night at Jardine's. Dave has come forward and told us that a check that was written to pay him for his band's performance during Thanksgiving week was bad and that Jardine's had put a stop payment on the check. Dave claims that he is out $3000.00 and that he had already paid all of his band members for the show, leaving him holding the bad check. This should be a stern warning to all Kansas City bands who are thinking of performing at the new Jardine's if it reopens with it's former management, even if you get a check from them, it doesn't mean that it's any good! If you are going to perform at Jardine's, you need to get your fee in CASH, up front, before you play a single note.

I can imagine that the media will be swarming Jardine's on December 14th if they decide to open their doors to the public, as the management has yet to return any phone calls to any of us.

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Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Jardines Kansas City Jazz Club Closing then Opening

Last Friday local Kansas City jazz club Jardines closed it's doors and really got a lot of publicity from Fox News. They are running the story on every segment during the day's news broadcasts mostly featuring an interview from local Jazz celebrity Dave Stephens on the circumstances surrounding the closing of Jardine's in Kansas City. I suppose you could say that curiosity is the driving force behind the news coverage, as there is definitely an unsolved mystery afoot here. The sudden closing of the doors, the sudden firing of ALL of the employees, the cancellation of Dave Stephens show on Saturday, and then the note on the door that as of Monday morning read "Closed for repairs". The fact that Beena Johnson (Jardine's Owner) has not returned Fox News' phone calls probably feeds this media fire.

We do have an update today on the Jardine's situation:

A new sign has been hand written and placed on the door saying that they are hiring new staff and will reopen on December 14th. Rumors have surfaced that many of the former staff members have not received their pay and that they were owed back pay before they were let go. Former employees have now come forward and reported that they had been threatened, physically and mentally abused, and were repeatedly paid late, slowly, or not at all for their services. Currently, Jardine's is only taking information via email and according to the note on the door they are asking that new applicants go to the website to apply for a position. It's safe to say that they are currently screening their calls!

Rumors are also floating around that the owner is claiming that she fired the entire staff for theft. Well of course this is hard to swallow - how could all 15 employees who were fired be stealing? I don't think so. It would take a brave and desperate soul to apply for a job with Jardine's under it's current management, if the last week's events aren't warning enough. Jardine's will apparently open it's doors on December 14th and hope for the best. If you are one of the Kansas City jazz bands that is scheduled to perform there, we would suggest getting your money up front!

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Obama Osawatomie Kansas Speech 2011

When it was announced that President Obama would be visiting Osawatomie, Kansas on Tuesday December 6th, 2011, the most common reaction was "why is he going to Osawatomie of all places?". The reason Obama's Speech took place in Osawatomie, Kansas this afternoon was because Osawatomie was the location that Theodore Roosevelt made a speech about the American economy and the President's idea for a "New Nationalism". Obama was also accompanied by local former Governor Kathleen Sebelius, who is now the Secretary of Health and Human Services in Washington. Tickets were sold, people camped out to get them, and the town of Osawatomie was given a quick makeover in preparation for President Obama. President Obama landed Air Force One at MCI Kansas City International Airport, and then made the one hour drive south on 69 Highway to Osawatomie, Kansas to deliver a speech at the gym at Osawatomie High School.

Obama "channeled" Teddy Roosevelt in his speech on economy and the middle class, and Roosevelt's idea of a New Nationalism today as he garnered many swells of coffee-fueled applause from the all white, all middle / lower class citizens of Osawatomie. Obama's speech was primarily about the redistribution of wealth, taxing the upper 1 percent class appropriately and fairly and giving the large companies in America incentive to keep jobs in the US instead of outsourcing to other countries. Obama suggests that if we invest our budget dollars into science and engineering, the big companies will start to focus on making products that are ingenuitive and can be sold throughout the world with the stamp "made in America". Obama pointed out that many jobs have been taken by computers, the internet, and ATM machines. He did not mention that about 10 percent of the jobs in America have been taken by illegal Mexicans.

Obama doesn't need to worry, however, as he will be re-elected no matter what he says between now and November 2012. The Republicans can't find anyone worth running against Obama and it is almost a certainty that Obama will be elected for a second term. We are just going to have to brace ourselves for an onslaught of name calling, smearing, and finger pointing in the next year as the politicians via for position in the 2012 election. None of what you see will matter, however, as Obama will be elected again and will continue with his vetoes and watchdog instituting. We're not saying that Obama isn't doing a good job, we're just saying that the next 12 months of political blah blah are not going to affect the outcome of the 2012 election - at all. Obama wins second term, that's the story.

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Monday, December 5, 2011

Frank White Fired From Fox News and Royals Organization

Notorious Royals second baseman Frank White was fired by Fox News and the Kansas City Royals for unknown reasons. According to Jack Harry and Frank Boal the firing did not have anything to do with Dayton Moore but more to do with Dan Glass. Kevin Shank was also fired. The story so far is that Frank White, All Star Second Baseman for the Kansas City Royals was sent to a downtown Kansas City hotel to get news from a Fox News employee that he was no longer needed at Fox or in the broadcast booth for the Royals.

Frank White took over the broadcasting job for the Kansas City Royals when Paul Splittorff passed away and has been calling Royals games ever since. His firing did not come as a surprise by those close to the organization as it was well known that Frank White did not get along well with the front office of the Royals organization. The reason that this has become such a big story is that there has not been an explanation given to the public from the Royals front office yet, and also the manner in which he was fired was considered by most to be unethical. Sam Mellinger from the Kansas City Star reported that "Royals general manager Dayton Moore is being blamed in many circles for White’s ouster from the broadcast booth, which multiple sources adamantly dispute and classify as a collaborative decision."

Jack Henry reported that Dayton Moore had little or nothing to do with the firing of Frank White, but rather the firing came from Royals upper brass member Dan Glass, acting out his father David Glass' wishes. It will be a shame to see anything keep Frank White from participating in the 2012 All Star Game to be held at Kauffman Stadium next summer, as they will surely be planning a huge celebration and honorary ceremony of former Royals stars including George Brett, Willie Wilson and of course Frank White. These players were the pillars of a generation of Royals success, in fact the ONLY success that the Royals have ever experienced since their inception. In fact, the 1985 Royals are the only professional sports team that has ever won a World Championship for Kansas City and neither the Kansas City Chiefs nor the Kansas City Royals have even come close since the 1985 Royals World Series Win. Most sports writers and news reporters in Kansas City writing these days were not around to see that 1985 team like we were and they need to show some respect. All they have to write about is some fiddling around with Mexican/Puerto Rican/Dominican baseball players and insane trades and shady ownership of the Royals and they will never understand how it felt to be at Kauffman Stadium during the early 80's when the Royals were on the NATIONAL front and they probably never will. We certainly hope that Frank White's firing won't keep him from participating in any ceremony honoring the 1985 Royals at the 2012 MLB All Star Game, and we hope that the young sports writers out there who are products of the "plastic generation" who have little or no emotion or sense of Royals pride understand Frank White's situation and not pretend that they were there when everything was REALLY happening.

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Sunday, December 4, 2011

Jardines KC Jazz Club Closed Likely Permanently

On Saturday afternoon we received a notice from our good friend Dave Stephens from the Dave Stephens Band warning his fans not to show up to his performance that night that was scheduled to be at Jardines Jazz Club in Kansas City near the Plaza. Dave said that Jardines had fired their entire staff with no advance notice on Saturday or perhaps on Friday. Currently, there is a sign on the door that says "closed for repairs", but according to several inside sources Jardines is closed for good.

It's hard to imagine the circumstances that may have surrounded the closing of Jardine's, but it had to have been something out of the ordinary due to the "sudden death" manner in which it closed. To hear that the entire staff was suddenly fired is proof that something was rotten at Jardine's, and to cancel a show on Dave Stephens at the last minute when they know that he flies all the way in from his home in Los Angeles just to perform at the club is just not right. Surely there is a good explanation for the closing of Jardine's as they have not done any sort of odd things like this in the past. They have been a steady rock in the rough waters that are the Kansas City jazz scene, as Kansas City jazz bands and jazz musicians hardly have anywhere to perform as it is.

Ironically enough, Kansas City is known for Jazz, but in reality there are less than a handful of venues that actually feature and promote live jazz. Jazz musicians are mostly loners, who are fairly arrogant and only want their own name to be known, this is why they don't really put together bands, rather they "sit in" with each other - or jazz performers with some notoriety put together a random group of jazz musicians to "back" their performances, often introducing each musician several times during a performance. Featured jazz musicians who will be affected by Jardine's closing will be Dave Stephens and his band, The Kansas City Lights, Danny Embrey and several other Kansas City bands. This is a serious blow to the jazz community as they are losing one of the most well known jazz venues in Jardine's, and they will be forced to look elsewhere for jazz gigs. A local booking agency is offering free sign up for jazz bands and jazz musicians at to help them find gigs in Kansas City and other areas in the Midwest.

Jardine's owner Beena Johnson hails from Pune, India and is an IT specialist (what else to they do down there, of course she is an IT specialist) and she was not available for comment on the closing of Jardine's jazz club in Kansas City.

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Chiefs Stomp Bears Easily as McCluster Leads Offense

The Kansas City Chiefs pounded the Chicago Bears like they weren't even there today, revealing that the Bears are not even close to a playoff quality team and are extremely inept at running the ball or throwing the ball. The only player that showed up for the Bears today was Julius Peppers, who pestered Tyler Palko as he easily led The Chiefs to a victory over the pathetic Chicago Bears.

Once again the Chiefs defense pummeled and stumped the opposing team's passing and running attack with sacks going to Tamba Hali, Justin Houston, Jon McGraw (uncredited), and a key interception by Eric Carr to boot. This is the second straight week that the Chiefs defense has allowed less than 14 points and in the past two weeks the Chiefs defense has only allowed a total of 16 points. The Chiefs really should have defeated the Steelers as well, but the offense just couldn't get it done. Dexter McCluster surprised everyone and shushed the doubters today as he put up monster numbers on the ground and in the air. McCluster caught a 45 yard touchdown pass at the end of the 1st half, representing the Chiefs only touchdown for the day. Dwayne Bowe was definitely off his game, dropping passes and acting like he doesn't care (as usual), we're not impressed with Dwayne Bowe today, or last week, or the week before that. Yes, we understand that Palko doesn't put the ball where he is supposed to most of the time, but Bowe still needs to go up and try to get that ball. We told you before the season even started that we should have gone after Plaxico Burress, look at how he's playing now.

Overall it is great to see the Chiefs playing defensive football again. It has been a long time since the Chiefs have dominated with their defense and with the way the offense is playing lately, we really have no other choice. In other news, our new 2.3 million dollar quarterback Kyle Orton played 1 down and injured his right index finger, and then left the game.

The Chiefs were almost the only winners today in the AFC West, until Denver once again got lucky and squeaked out a win.

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